Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
