so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Randomize
