the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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