As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
Randomize
