Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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