Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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