This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize
