I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Randomize
