Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
