He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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