Its about making memories worth repressing
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize
