the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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