Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Randomize
