I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
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