Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
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