Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
Randomize
