I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
She throws back shots like they are NO-THING. I swear, she goes through like five straight tequila shots, does a jello shot, chases with half a hot dog, has a rum and coke, and then takes her shirt off and makes an impromptu bandage out of it for fuckin' Tim who cut himself on the flagpole. I'm going to marry her.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
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