we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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