I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
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