Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
