My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
Randomize