a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
