Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
