i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
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