just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
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