he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
Randomize
