I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
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