You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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