that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
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