Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
Randomize
