Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
Someone stole a lamp last night.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
