New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Randomize