I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
