Why are handjobs necessary in class?
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
