i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
Momentum is force x velocity. So therefore velocity is 0 - hammered, and force is ur legs locked up and ur face hits the ground.
I felt paralized they just wouldnt move. We need segways when were drunk cuz if we start to fall forward they well take off and save the fall.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
Randomize
