I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize
