Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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