Taylor Swift is so right about you.
Swine flu. Run for my life!
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Randomize
