thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
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