Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
thus making me awesome and them whores
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
Randomize
