sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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