OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
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