i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
