fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
