i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
The feeling are messing with the penis
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize