ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Randomize