I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Your penis caused this!
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize
