Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Randomize
