Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Can't talk, ducks in the car
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
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