Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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